Another part of my life > Love

Ok. I should talk about Eny, my boy now. I've always wanted to talk about him. Ya, my mom is really my mom. I said this because she clearly guessed right what I was thinking two nights ago when I told her there's a job offer but is a Hong Kong company. I might need to be based there. She clearly knew the one I couldn't let go is Eny. And yes, this man came into my life, I mean the time that he really involved was just around 3 months ago, yet, day by day I'm more and more into him.

apart from I don't know will he be succeeded in future, he's really the best guy I've ever met. The way he treated me like no one else made me felt pampered. I could say now I'm pretty sure this is the kind of guy I like apart from he doesn't have his own career yet at this age. I sincerely hope that he will have a great future and I really think that he has a bright future. Even after everything, I still think so.

I don't have high expectation on him, I just hope he will get a job, we will get married in future and our marriage will be blessed by everyone. Since we're in a different race, different culture, different religion marriage, I don't know will there be anyone that don't agree with it. But in this, I am very sure that, this is my life, I have the right to choose and even anything in future happened, I will bare with the consequences.

We have a dream that is to migrate to New Zealand in future. We will build a nice family together. We will have house there. Actually, that's where he wants it, I've never been to New Zealand yet but I think it would be great too, I've been to Australia and I like to very much. Of course, my favourite place is still Switzerland, but it is too far from my family and is very hard to just get in like that because of the language barrier we gonna face. I am cool with his idea to have our future life in New Zealand.

We will have 2 children when I am prepared. We will travel around before having any children. A simple life we will have. The best is that my family can move to New Zealand as well and stay near to each other. I don't mind his family to be thereas well, but, we're not living with neither his nor my family. We will enjoy the life of us two and later have children. He'll be working and me too. But I'll spend as much time as possible to take care of our cute little kids. we will have sheep perhaps, that's what people thing when you migrate to such a country that's so close to the nature.

We will have 1 daughter and 1 son. Really hope that we will have such a fantastic life. I'm not sure how he thinks about our future and from the way he treated me, I chose to trust him. Trust him with all my heart. I wish for a fruitful ending for us.

University > Society

When you want something badly, you always don't get it. That's why key to happiness is not getting what you want but wanting what you get. So, I am in dilemma now, Shall I stay or leave? I've been working for 10 days since 22nd of August 2012 in a so called listed company. So, everyone would think that working in "big company" like this must be interesting and learnt a lot. My purpose to be here was also to learn something, but everything isn't what I thought when I started work. I thought it would only be 1 or 2 days that like that. But it last for 10 days and even now the 11th day of work, I can write blog in the company. Some people may like it, I am a fresh graduate and I hope to find something that could let me learn more, gain as much experience as I can. But, in here, I think I've learnt almost nothing? 

I was pretty sure 2 days ago that even I don't get any offer I should leave because staying here and doing the "work" now isn't what I want. And I think I don't deserve to be in this situation. should be able to do things I want. Especially that I'm at this age, I can't think of any reason to convince myself to be here. At the beginning is already a fault, I shouldn't even started here. It's kind of just a waste of time probably. 

Will it be a wrong decision again to leave? I am the weakest when come to decision making, I think I have "decision making phobia". I know that God put me here for a reason, for a reason that I don't even know. will everything work out the way it supposed to be? Or rather I should say will everything work out as I want it to be? 

I am still in dilemma until today that I retype it out. I wrote this piece of my mind in the office two days ago. Today is Saturday, but yeah, hell worst Saturday I ever had because I am in office!